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  • Writer's pictureJames Cook

Grief & Healing: You Are Not Alone

We must all sadly lose those whom we love, and whilst that fact may unify us, it can often feel like we are the only ones going through the process of grieving a loved one. The truth is that you are not alone. There exists a vast network of people and services that are here to help and care for us all in our time of need. It may be hard right now, but you will get through this and things will get better.


WHAT IS GRIEF?


Grief is the natural response to loss, particularly to the loss of someone or some living thing that has died, to which a bond or affection was formed. Although conventionally focused on the emotional response to loss, grief also has physical, cognitive, behavioural, social, cultural, spiritual, and philosophical dimensions.


THE GRIEVING PROCESS


The pain of grief is caused by the overwhelming amount of stress hormones being released during the grieving process. These effectively stun the muscles they contact. Stress hormones act on the body in a similar way to broken heart syndrome. It's common for the grief process to take a year or longer. A grieving person must resolve the emotional and life changes that come with the death of a loved one. The pain may become less intense, but it's perfectly normal to feel emotional for many years.


ACCEPTING A LOSS


These are 6 ways others have learned to better cope with the death of a loved one.

  1. Take your time to mourn.

  2. Remember how the person impacted your life.

  3. Have a funeral that speaks to their personality.

  4. Continue their legacy.

  5. Continue to speak to them and about them.

  6. Know when to get help.

There is no set timetable for grief. You may start to feel better in 6 to 8 weeks, but the whole process can last from months to years. You may start to feel better in small ways. It will start to get a little easier to get up in the morning, or maybe you'll have more energy.


GRIEF COUNSELING


Bereavement counsellors are trained and qualified to help you process the feelings you have as you go through the stages of grief - denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance - and adapt to your new life.

There are several local services that can help you to better deal with your bereavement, if you would like assistance in finding one please let us know and we'll be happy to help. A good place to start if the NHS website, simply follow the link below and you'll find a wealth of knowledge and support. https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/advice-for-life-situations-and-events/bereavement/

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